Reality Check

You wake up and realize you feel like crap. You know that you have the tools and you are not using them... You spend hard earned money on something to just let it sit and collect dust. I have to figure out why I am still allowing myself to sink into old patterns. I love food it however does not love me! I have allowed myself to bounce back up higher then I have ever been in my life. Why do I keep doing this to myself? I watch all the shows Biggest Loser, Heavy, Ruby, and more. I know that I am not alone in my struggle but for some reason I cannot seem to get a handle on things every time I think I am finally gonna make the necessary change I do great for a short burst of time and then quickly fall back into my old habits. I almost wish I had someone to follow me around and kick me every time I make the wrong choices. My own personal Jillian! I work on my feet all day in a hot kitchen and by the time I get off work I am exhausted. Every muscle and bone in my body aches I am afraid that if I don't change soon I will soon be unable to move. I convince myself I am doing fine that I am able to work am that is a small blessing but in reality I am barely existing! I HAVE GOT TO CHANGE!